What it Means to be a Powerful Communicator with Dr. Meribeth Dayme
Meet today's guest:
Dr. Meribeth Dayme
PhD, is an exceptional personal performance coach known worldwide for her pioneering work and expertise in the function and use of the human voice and communication. She is a coach and consultant for leaders in the fields of business, and well-known coaches in theatre, voice and singing.
Specializing in personal transformation and captivating performance, she works with clients on the unseen energetic components of communication such as voice and presence that make lasting impressions and create visible results. Using a scientific and conscious approach to the way we speak and present ourselves, she shows clients a way to finding the authenticity and honesty of spirit that they crave. Her clients quickly display a remarkable energy and presence. Her books include: Presence, Confidence, and Personal Power and The Performer’s Voice.
Check out her facebook page at Inspiring Singers and Speakers
When it comes to communicating there is so much more for us to be conscious of than the words that we choose to say.
This week my guest on Vibrant Powerful Moms was Dr. Meribeth Dayme who is a communication expert with enough wisdom to fill hundreds of hours of podcast time.
Helping executives prepare for presentations, I realized how many times we are not fully there…that our minds are somewhere else…on the 10 other chores that we need to be doing. We're not starting the conversation with a blank screen, but with a full page already written and there's no space for anything else on there.
To really communicate effectively we have to drop everything.
… there is nowhere else that I can be right this minute than here talking to you and so the best thing I can do is be completely here.
To me, communication is a foundational skill. It's something we use every day, at home, at work, on the sidewalk…it comes up everywhere. Add in our relatively recent ability to reach across the globe and we have a need to communicate even when we're at home alone with just our computer.
Here are just a few of the highlights from the show, but be sure to check out the podcastto get all the nuggets:
Listening & silence…
♦ I think the whole issue with listening is that the other person doesn't feel honoured if you don't hear them. It doesn't matter whether you agree or not, it has to do with just listening and then responding. Hear them out even if you don't agree with what you are hearing…do away with expectations of what you're going to hear.
♦ For the moment, if nothing else honor the other person's differences. It's their path, it's their life, it's their way of learning. So honour and support them as a human being.
♦ Lots of people panic when there is silence because they think it's a long time, but to the person listening it isn't. I've never known anybody to walk away during a pause.
♦ First set your intent: it's really important to set an intent because that tells your mind what it is you want and it sets it up to happen for you.
The importance of grounding…
♦ Grounding, to me, starts with your feet. One of the interesting things that I learned from the martial arts was that if your feet are turned out at all - and a lot of people's are – your energy field is actually weak. You are a pushover.
♦ Change the feet and change the voice.
A grounding exercise…
Imaginary breath – imagine taking your breath in at the base of your spine. Bring it up the back to the top of your head. Exhale taking the breath back down the front of your spine to meet where it started. So you have a long narrow, loop of air and what it does is keep you centered in your spine which is deep in your body instead of superficially up in your chest or your lungs or your throat.
♦ Lots of people think the voice is just your throat and that couldn't be further from the truth. Think of your voice as coming from your whole body – think lower. I've told people… put your mouth down in your pelvis!
Meribeth is a fountain of knowledge. In our 25 minutes together she covered tips for being a good listener; how thinking there is only one right answer hurts us; why tension affects your voice; how to be compelling when sharing your thoughts; and so much more.
Listen to the podcast to hear it all!
Don't forget your gift!
It's so important for parents to have a way of not only speaking to children, but teaching them how to communicate effectively as well. As a result, Meribeth created a handout on 10 Communication Skills That Will Help Your Child Succeed. Send Meribeth an email at firstname.lastname@example.org and she'll send you the PDF.
FYI, tip #7 in the handout addresses how parents can use children's stories to expand their own expressiveness and model this for their children, which was promised in the interview. This tip is based on an idea from Meribeth's book Presence, Confidence, and Personal Power which is available at Amazon.
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